Sarah stringer AKA, to Sharkey & Duff as Sally, (that’s another story) Is one of Sharkey’s long term friends.
Sharkey has worked with sally for many years and celebrated lots of birthdays with her, the mile stone ones do tend to last a while. It was sally’s birthday at the beginning of January and she has had many parties’ already (and she really does know how to party) the official one was a surprise party in Manchester, which was fantastic!
So here we are in June, and this is the last of the big celebrations, there are 28 girls and 2 boys off to Warsaw in Poland.
And Sharkey & Duff have been asked to go!
As Sally’s 5Oth birthday bash approached Sharkey and Duff spent weeks as usual deliberating and cogitating over our wardrobe choices for each day and night (all of which went right out of the window after we arrived and started drinking the Polish beverages) and researching boutiques in Warsaw. When normal people just look forward to a holiday Sharkey and Duff are planning with military precision shoe choices, heel heights, color coordination’s and just in -casers. Nothing is left to chance we like to be organized in the wardrobe department on a mini break. Although, sometimes we have been known to completely leave all our clothes behind for events, leading us to frantically Uber to a dusty old boutique in some rural town.
We all arrived at the airport Boyed up by san Miguel and excitement of being on our jollies for a few days. Tessa, Sally’s sister had arranged for Sally to be the proud new owner of a karaoke mike and handed out whistles to the group. The task being that whenever the whistles were blown, Sally had to bang out a big tune of the whistle blower’s choice, wherever she was. I have to say Sally took on this task with aplomb and much to the amusement of us and the surrounding crowds held her own little fabulous, very funny but tone-deaf concert.
A vision from Poland of Sally wearing a grey Afro wig, sporting a Zimmer frame and wet look Wendy Jacket whilst belting out Bjork will stay with us and the polish locals forever !
As we arrived in Warsaw a little jaded in the early hours the rest of the gang headed to the hotel and Sharkey, Duff and Sharkey’s daughter Megan set off in search of our apartment. We arrived at the offices of Capital One apartments as booked on booking.com. The apartment building looked fabulous and we were very impressed and excited for the weekend ahead. As we stood waiting at reception though it became apparent that there was a little problem with our booking. Apparently, there were two Janet’s and Janet number 1 had picked up our keys ( naughty No1 Janet). After a wait, some hushed phone calls to a colleague that we couldn’t translate as (polish isn’t our strong point) we were sent on our merry way with some keys, an address and a taxi booking.
We arrived at our holiday apartment building and we will use that line loosely, we were met by a graffiti filled exterior and halls that reminded me of those murder scenes in CSI Miami. The door had 3 big locks and we weren’t feeling the holiday feeling. Unless Strangeways is your go to holiday spot. when we eventually unlocked the 3 bolts and entered our home for the weekend, to add insult to injury we found one small bed between 3 of us and by this time it was 1.30am. Now Sharkey and Duff are both a little hormonal these days, this can manifest itself as anxiety, paranoia or anger depending on the occasion or time of month. On this occasion Sharkey had the anger issue on a monumental scale. If it hadn’t been such dodgy place and so late we could have seen the funny side but oh no the person who sent us to the hovel got the Sharkey wrath all guns blazing. So much so they nearly threw our money back the next day in fear, we didn’t even have to complain again. Ha ha as in the words of Shakespeare “And though she may be but little, she is fierce”
Tomorrow is a new day though and after booking into a very accommodating IBIS, we were able to enjoy our Polish experience. I have to say we loved Warsaw the architecture is breathtaking, varied and a joy to walk around and experience. A visit to the Old Town is a must. It’s a total feast for the eyes. You could happily sit and people watch the whole day. The restaurants and bars are plentiful, the food was fabulous and inexpensive, and we have never seen so many Amber jewellers in our my lives. Sharkey and I managed to find as always, some lovely pieces of clothing and jewellery from local stalls and little boutiques along the way . We love to shop kids.
High points of the weekend
Us all getting wet to Noah’s ark extremes 5 mins before the taxis for the airport arrived and having to travel home in wet knickers, Alice Coopers Makeup and bad hair.
Realising our boarding cards were now also pissed wet through and illegible in our pockets
We would like to thank Sally for inviting us and giving us the chance to visit such an amazing place, to all the gang who were some of the warmest, loveliest and funniest people I’ve ever met. We have never laughed so much, drunk so much or looked as ropey in our lives . We would like to apologise to Megan our long-suffering and patient companion who had to put up with us repeating ourselves, forgetting everything, losing everything and for having to herd us everywhere like two small, very badly behaved children
A hung over Sharkey and Duff is neither a stylish or coiffured one though, hence the lack of selfies and lots of pictures of lovely buildings!
Things we learnt whilst away
Proof again that Duff looks shifty she got pulled, frisked and bag searched on both flights as always.
When sharkey gets angry she reminds you of pissed off chihuahua
Realising Pocket rocket and fitness freak Sharkey won’t walk more than 100 yards unless there’s a corona at the end!
Duff however will walk aimlessly around cities with no sense of direction and with no specific destination until you lose the will to live.
We will be back Warsaw !!
Love Sharkey and Duff xxx